Unmatched Intimacy

We come from two different worlds yet here are, unmatched not realizing the potential we could awaken from each other. Let’s begin with a smile I can simulate with practice, a hug I could generate through trust, a kiss I could feel in relief. Sharing our stories implicating our laughter, our sadness, our failures, our triumphs bringing our unmatched doubts closer than before. I wanna experience this form of intimacy, this exhibit of loyalty our bodies can easily translate.

We’ve suffered long enough.

– C.A. Thomas

Therapy

May 1st, 2018 was indeed the scariest and most surprising day of my life. Early that morning I received news that I was gonna be a father. Nervous and afraid I shared the news with few who are closest to me. Upon learning the news came the devastating moment of also learning that my unborn child was in the high percentile of being miscarried. Depression paid me an unexpected visit that kept me isolated and quiet for many weeks and on the day of our ultrasound we were told that our baby had already passed. The would’ve been mother of my child has become the therapy I desperately sought out. The sight of her brings joy that entices my advantage of learning to smile once more. I crave her hugs, her tenderness I miss at times when I find myself all alone. Although we’re not together my heart has reserved a special place for her. Plans are subject in changing but I’m learning to accept God’s plans are much bigger and sufficient than my very own. To my unborn child who’s now with the heavily father himself…… I love you.

– C.A. Thomas

Great conversation ending in ‚ÄúV‚ÄĚ.

Conversation that captures the attention of a smile is quite rare. Thinking of an angelic face that captivates every inch of energy that surfaces to the root of your soul, climbing its way to the very top of a beaming light I call “life”. A shareable laugh we both are entitled to share on a day serving as the importance of an established new beginning. Virtuous in a dream, vibrant in many details verifying such substance beyond tangible exuberance. I verify this with a rose of I give to you….. calling it “Vermique”.

– C.A. Thomas

Pinnacle Thinking

Time has revealed that no matter how much you encourage others to improve themselves “self” should always begin as the foundation of a successful structure. No harm or inspiring words are ever dispersed in crippling the handicapped but to instill discipline needed in facing the adversities life delivers. Until you determine the changes needed in your well being disappointment will always remain the familiar that could become difficult to rid of.

– C.A. Thomas

BookMark

First off I would like to thank all of you for assisting me on this journey of writing. Your comments and likes have eagerly encouraged me to continue writing better than before. The time has arrived for me to put my writings on hold, for I am now embarking on a journey that requires more of my time than anticipated. Once again I truly thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

Always,

– C.A. Thomas

Perseverance

For Stephanie.

The achievement in perseverance is already knowing the battle is won. The harder life becomes the easier it is releasing a struggle that we ourselves are constantly battling daily. In fear of judgement we could become guarded of our “Achilles Heel” when our strength is what testifies our healing. It is important that we credit ourselves for surviving, making it further by waking up then previously held through captivity in pain. The brightness that lies ahead of us is worth the reach……. as the strength encourage us to never loosen the grip.

– C.A. Thomas

Deserve

In our hearts we feel we deserve the person who attracts us, the career our childhood illuminates our dreams to pursue. With enough disappointments life depicts a totally different outlook on what we feel we deserve. We deserve the right to be happy although in the beginning we’re so eager placing our happiness in the hands of another who may be unable to carry the weight of responsibility behind it. Later understanding that happiness is self deserved never rewarded. We deserve the right to feel free, yet free somehow never feels adequate when we as a people are scolded for voicing our opinions and concerns on the issues constantly keeping us all segregated as a whole. Most importantly we deserve to feel important because we are through the eyes of the ones who’ve always believed in us.

Deserve belongs to us because we’re well deserved.

– C.A. Thomas

Relapse

So easy placing forth coming results of a pattern in the hands of someone you admire. To rid yourself of habits for the approval of praise. Dedicating every attempt in hopes of a promising change, only reminded of what caused the addiction. Desperation eagerly latching onto false hope in the form of a dream already sold. The admiration behind this is never giving in to the possibility of failure. Believing in self in reasoning to adhere and commit to one’s determination. Realizing that depending on self it is you and only you who compels to life’s struggle through triumph. We’re much stronger than we credit ourselves, more courageous than we’ve ever been….. realizing that a relapse doesn’t define who we are, but the will in trying solidifies that we never gave up.

– C.A. Thomas

And The Award Goes To…

I’ve always felt women are never recognized enough…… I dedicate this award to you.

Love for a reason, making love for every reason. Your kisses solidifies the very trust capable of uncovering hidden explanations within us men. Supporting with intent, adoring with such sentiment how could this woman go unnoticed? She hurts more than us, she endures pain stronger than trust still she forgives with open arms. Her legs closed, her heart unfolds the revelation of pregnancy. Months surpass, her uterus enlarging in preparation of demonstrating life itself. Water breaks, she pushes, she gasps with overwhelming virtue placed in the cup of her arms. Tiny eyes blinking, staring through the window of a woman who’s been through Heaven’s measures, emotions challenged thus smiling like it all occurred in a previous dream. No acting involved, no rehearsal needed, no directors capturing the moments of her on film. She’s her own category, her own contender, her own voice.

It is with great honor and privilege to announce the winner for displaying such consistency, such compassion filled with grace in every step she’s taken.

Ladies and Gentlemen…. *opens envelope*

“And the award goes to…..”

– C.A. Thomas

‚ÄúMW‚ÄĚ

For Monique,

Nothing is more beautiful than a beginning unfolding before our very eyes. Somehow your beginning has reluctantly brought you to a place where many eyes can view a captured essence beyond imagination. Your journey orchestrated many tests only illustrating perseverance among strength and the unmeasurable faith you’ve always harbored. A smile igniting a small room bright enough to view such an amazing accomplishment you’ve achieved. You’re the inspiration encouraging others to exemplify their dreams, excelling beyond the unlimited opportunities they’ve yet to grasp. Dreams are possible to achieve….. you’re the epitome of our reality.

Thank you for that.

– C.A. Thomas